Sivana

The feeling that I was being watched has not left me since the last day. And it wasn't about my lover, peacefully snoring with a stuffy nose on the pillow next to me after a night of madness. Not in his suspicious sister, who takes care of her brother unnecessarily and looks at me without warning in a neighborly way. It's absolutely not that my friend is preparing a festive evening for my birthday with guests and gifts, which I can't stand. I feel uneasy for another reason.

A ragged ringing in my head… today I'm 31. Every year on my birthday on October 31, HE gives me a gift that I don't want to accept…What will happen this time? –that's what really bothers me. Stretching, I jumped out of the warm bed onto the cold parquet floor and headed for the kitchen.

It's almost blooming. It was raining outside the window. His drops, running down the glass, seemed to look into the house, wanting to make sure that I was ready for today.

A good omen for a birthday, I thought.

While my lover was sleeping, I filled the kettle with fresh water and put it on the stove. I fed the cat. Grabbing a clean towel of my favorite berry color from the closet, I went to the shower.

"I don't recognize myself," a premonition of danger took hold of me when I caught my wild look for a moment in the reflection of the bathroom mirror. I have always lived alone, after the orphanage and studying at the university, I absolutely did not need company, except for one night. But now I suddenly caught myself thinking that lately I've been like a different person. And…is there a person at all?

Something changed in me gradually, and so imperceptibly from each of my birthdays. I was no longer afraid, but I was still afraid of the unexpected. Everything should go according to plan, it's safer and calmer for me. But today is not the day when this is possible…

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door and a boiling kettle. Taking a bitten-off apple – my dietary breakfast of the gifts of autumn, I turned off the gas and went to find out who is so impatient to disturb me in the morning. My stupid neighbor was standing on the threshold with a pumpkin pie in his hands.

– Here, Sivana, here, my mother baked for your holiday, – he said, as if mocking, handing me a gift. His mother was a strange woman, once I noticed her on my doorstep muttering gibberish.

– Very nice, thank you. Tell your mother, thank you, " I was about to close the door and get rid of his vulgar shifty look, when he added

"And this was in your drawer, another gift," he winked, holding out a white envelope. His voice sounded creepy and slow, as it seemed to me.

I slammed the door. I threw the pumpkin pie into the bucket, since my plans did not include poisoning myself with the brew of a local witch.

The envelope is as always without the return address and the sender's stamp. They come to me every year and on my birthday. She opened the envelope. It contains a postcard with a picture of a deer with human hands, standing on its hind legs with a golden halo in its horns. On the back of the postcard is printed:

"I command you, SIWA, my goddess of autumn and garden fruits, to be naked today at the agreed place after sunset, holding a red apple in your right hand and a bunch of red grapes in your left. The time has come.

An old silver chain with a pendant in the shape of a deer's head fell out of the envelope. Fine Celtic work…The hands reached out to her of their own accord. I held the gift to my neck, and the chain fastened by itself. I shuddered with fright, but reassured myself that the lock of the chain is probably magnetic and it is as easy to remove as to put it on.

–Are you trying on gifts already, honey? – I heard a hoarse voice from the bedroom, I looked around and saw the shaggy head of my Irish lover spread out in a smile. He was sitting on the bed, in the pose of an alpha male, confident in his irresistibility, and completely unashamed of a naked body covered with freckles and red hair from head to toe. In his hands was a bag from the store with expensive underwear, which he handed to me and grinned.

– Come here, try it on, and please me on your Birthday, – he said in a voice that does not tolerate objections.

I went over, kissed him, and unwrapped the gift. His hands pushed the silk robe off my shoulders, leaving me ready to try on underwear. The cherry-colored weightless lace grace with the help of his dexterous hands was on me, just like himself…

"I have things to do, Thomas. There's a meeting in 15 minutes, " I stopped the hot lover. I liked to tease him and make him tame.

–Well, we'll see you in the evening, right? On your holiday? Can I come over? displeased, he loosened his grip and released me.

– Maybe. I have to get dressed, "I urged him.

The former military man is used to gathering at lightning speed and not asking unnecessary questions. So five minutes later he was no longer in my house. That's why I like red Thomas. For the opportunity not to get in the way and be there whenever I want.

–And the gift is really good, he knows my taste, – I appreciated the underwear Thomas gave me in front of the mirror, but suddenly shuddered. A necklace on my neck flashed in the mirror, I forgot about it at the wrong time. I felt terrible.

I was almost sure who the sender of it was. I didn't want to and couldn't believe it, because a year has passed. I thought it was over. I thought I could live in peace now. But this was not the case.

My birthday flew by for the usual things, meetings with patients in our city psychological center. The feeling of the object of observation did not leave me all day.

In the middle of the day at lunchtime, I looked into the library, where I liked to visit when I was still a student. My friend Mary works here as a librarian. It was nice and surprising that she decided not to give me a grand party as she had previously intended for my birthday. I hugged her with joy.