Two for tragedy. Volume 1
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These words made me grimly chuckle: yes, she was offended! But I was doubly offended by her actions, and wished to teach her a lesson. I wanted to teach her a lesson that it was a very bad idea to confront me.
I headed toward my girlfriends. Julia was the first to notice my approach; she shoved her friend in the shoulder and glanced at me meaningfully. Viper hastily took her hand away from her eyes and looked at me, first with surprise and then with hatred.
As if to give her friend a chance to deal with me, Julia hurried away, and Viper watched my approach with her arms crossed over her chest and her eyes fixed on me. When I approached her, she stared boldly into my face, not hiding her glittering eyes.
– What was that? – I asked, looking down at Viper like a teacher looking at a student. At that moment, I could barely keep myself from yelling at her or hurting her physically. Or kill her.
– It was my attempt to get rid of your company! – The girl blurted out angrily. – But if that didn't work, I'll use the other way out!
– You think that's the best way out of this situation? – I said mockingly. – Because of one small unpleasant quarrel, you cowardly run away into the bushes!
– I have many reasons for that!
– How interesting. Well, tell me!
– You think you are allowed to insult and abuse other people! You're arrogant and selfish, and you've made it clear that you despise me both as a person and as a woman! – Viper snarled.
I raised my eyebrows in surprise. Was she the one I'd thought so highly of when we first met in the library? The narrowness of her thoughts and judgement struck me unpleasantly.
– Go on, tell me I'm wrong! I'm always wrong and I don't understand anything about people. How could I? I am only a naive fool! – she added mockingly. – What's the use of such a performance now? I don't want to practise with you, you're squeamish about practising with me, so come on…
– What makes you think I'm shy of studying with you? – I interrupted her, trying to ask the question as calmly as possible.
– Oh, no, you've done nothing to push me away from you! Blame it on my vivid imagination! – Viper snapped back.
– No, explain to me where you got those ideas from. – I was furious at her mocking tone and how stubbornly she clung to her delusions.
– Do you want to know?
– I'm dying to know.
– You made it clear to me from the first time we met that I was a nobody, and you were just forced to study with me. Humiliated your excessive pride. And your lateness was on purpose! God, I only realised it now, because you're such an amazing liar that you made me believe you and feel guilty for my harsh words! And now I realise how fair they were! – she said quietly but firmly.
– Is that all? – I asked.
– You are arrogant and selfish. I can't stand it. You look at me contemptuously like a cockroach, you make me feel insignificant and stupid. You don't have a shred of humanity in you! All you're filled with is contempt for people!
– I had a better opinion of you," I said with a scornful grin. – And you turned out to be a common coward.
– I'd rather be a coward than a monster like you!
Her words took my breath away.
Viper looked me straight in the eye, and I suddenly thought she knew who I was, knew my secret.
– Monstro in frontum, monstro in anima. But you hide your true face behind a pretty shell and deceive people," Viper said quietly. Without knowing it, she'd revealed my true nature.
She was absolutely right: I was a monster.
– I thought you'd be braver, but I guess I was wrong, because you act so stupid the first time you fight," I said grimly.
– I thought you were better than what you turned out to be," Viper said bitterly. Her face went pale. – And maybe I'm not as smart as you, but I don't deserve your insults," she whispered, her head lowered.
Realising how much my harsh words and my behaviour had hurt Viper, I felt a mental discomfort.
Viper looked up at me, and I saw again the same pain that had been in her eyes the moment I'd hurt her. In that second I realised how wrong I had been about her, thinking she was weak of spirit and afraid to fight. I could feel it now: her airy soul could not bear the insults with which I had wounded her quite undeservedly. It was my fault, and I did not wish to transfer it to the fragile shoulders of this mortal girl. I know how to admit my mistakes. I was overcome with regret and shame for my mistakes. And for once, vampire pride didn't drown out the voice of reason.
– I'm sorry," I said, surprised at myself.
Viper's eyes flashed with genuine surprise.
– I do love Baudelaire's work, and I often reread it so that I don't forget it in my memory," I said hastily.
– What do you like his poetry? I wanted to know just that, and you took my question that way! – Viper said quietly, frowning slightly.
– 'He was writing the truth. As you said, there is darkness in his poems, although, no, they are just soaked in it, but this darkness does not repel, on the contrary – it envelops the mind with beauty, melancholy and majesty. Reading Baudelaire, I involuntarily think about the frailty of the world and what beauty is hidden where people are not destined to see it, because they are blind and do not want to see the beauty.
Why am I saying all this? To earn Viper's favour? A mortal?
What a shame.
– And to hear that, I had to listen to your insults first? – she asked sadly.
– I apologise to you for my unimaginative and undignified behaviour," I apologised again.
How many times do I have to repeat those words to her? And how many more times would I have to repeat them before Viper would forgive me? Why am I so eager for her forgiveness?
– What did I do to make you so angry? – the girl asked
– I don't know. I must have been in a bad mood," I said.
It was true. I didn't know the answer to that question myself.
– So you're very hot-tempered? But what makes you think you're allowed to take it out on people around you?
– I can control my emotions.
God, what am I doing? I'm persuading a mortal girl not to refuse to study with me!
– Is that why you were rude to Julia?
Oh, shit. How clever of her to catch me!
– You made the exchange behind my back. You have to admit, it's not very nice to be exchanged like a thing," I rebuked her in turn.