Небывалые былицы для Алешки
Шрифт:
– Я иду звонить в полицию. Пусть этого нехорошего человека посадят в тюрьму, чтобы другим ворам неповадно было!
И четвертый поддержал третьего:
– Правильно, пусть посиди годик – другой в тюрьме на хлебе и воде, может быть, после этого поймет, что приличные люди ночью в чужие квартиры не лазают.
После этих слов вор испугался еще сильнее. Жуля возмутилась, она знала, что такое голодная жизнь:
– Впятером на одного набросились? Может быть, человеку есть нечего! Может быть, его никто не воспитывал. Может быть, его никто никогда не любил. Может быть, его даже родная мама никогда не любила и не баловала. Может быть, у него нет друзей, и живет он на улице! Холодно ему и дождик на него капает, а чужие люди его обижают.
Вор,
– Погрызи, легче станет. Если тебе переночевать негде, ложись на мою подстилку. Вдвоем теплее будет.
Вас, конечно, интересует, чем закончилась эта история. Утром этот человек пошел в ЖЭК и устроился работать дворником. Тоже надо сказать, профессия очень нужная.
Он разбил клумбы вокруг нашего дома, а на клумбах выращивает анютины глазки, маргаритки и разные другие симпатичные цветы. Теперь жильцы нашего подъезда с ним дружат. Он оказался очень милым человеком. Его действительно раньше никто не любил. А Жуля – вот она такая. Так с нами и живет.
Cheaty
Dear children, I decided to apologize to you from all grown-ups. We deceive you all the time, telling different tales and tall stories, and a lot of you, little trusting kids, believe us. Never believe any grown-up when he says that cats, dogs, horses, bears and any other living creatures can talk. It is far from being true, I would say, it’s a complete lie.
I have never met any talking dog in my life, except one, living in our porch. I cannot exactly say that she spends all her free time talking to the dwellers- nothing of such kind. I won’t tell lies, believe me! Every morning when I go to work, she wags friendly with her tail and says, ‘Good morning!’ In the evening when I come home, we talk a little about this or that. I must admit, that our dog is a bit liar and a boaster. Her name is not quite glamorous, just ordinary-Cheaty. I think sometimes, if I had such name, what I would do? I think, in the best case I would be a lonely, miserable pirate on a desert island. I would be all in tattoos. Do you know, what I would write on myself? “I’m not a cheat, I’m an honest pirate.” That’s it.
In spite of the name, Cheaty is rather cheerful. Not to mention the name, her growth is funny and she is as long and round, as a roll of sausage. When I look at her, it seems to me, she lacks a pair of legs in the middle. In other words, Cheaty, of course, is far from being a beauty, but she has got a gentle character and a charming smile. The fact that she is a liar and a boaster is nothing, mere trifle. She is a heroic dog and defends us bravely.
One day the following event happened. It was a deep night. The dwellers of our house had been sleeping for a long time. All of a sudden: bang! Bang! Bang! There was crash, clink of broken glass, somebody’s shout,
‘Help! Help!’
We all, wearing pajamas and nightshirts, ran out of the house. And what did we see there? We saw a burglar with a big bundle of stolen things. He defended himself against our Cheaty. She licked the bandit with such joy, that he screamed, ‘Help! Help!’ I told you, that Cheaty has got a tender character and it’s an affectionate dog. One of the neighbours said,
‘We should call the police.’
Another one got angry,
‘It’s a disgrace to rob people at night!’
The burglar, of course, was frightened. The third neighbour said,
‘I’m going to call the police. This bad man should go to prison, so that other burglars never do such things.’
The fourth neighbour supported the third one,
‘That’s right, let him go to prison for one year or two and then he may realize, that decent people don’t break into other people’s flats.’
After these words the burglar got more frightened. But Cheaty was outraged; she knew what a hungry life meant,
‘Why five of you have fallen upon one? Maybe, the man is hungry! Maybe, he is badly brought up. Maybe, nobody has ever loved him. Maybe, his mother has never loved and spoiled him. Maybe, he hasn’t got any friends and he lives in the street; maybe, he’s cold and light rain falls on him and other people offend him.’
When the burglar heard, how Cheaty defended him, he completely forgot that he had to escape. We can understand him, because he was surprised, that he met a talking dog for the first time. The neighbours started to argue with Cheaty, that police had to deal with bandits and they should be kept in prison, because they couldn’t live with decent people. But Cheaty told neighbours, that when she had lived in the doghouse and had been kept on a chain, she had been hungry and angry. When she had been hungry and angry, she had chased hens and sparrows and even some times had stolen bread from birds. Now she is different, because her life has changed for better, and she has become better. The neighbours started to argue, they said, it was impossible to compare a man and a dog, they are different things. Cheaty said, that she was not a thing, and if somebody was miserable, it did not matter who it was: a dog, a man or a frog. You should have pity for everyone. When the burglar heard these kind words in his defence, he sat down and cried loudly. The neighbours were at a loss, because nobody knew what to do with the crying bandit. Cheaty brought him a bone, which had been stored for breakfast, and poked the poor burglar with her nose and said,
‘Gnaw it, you’ll be better. If you don’t know where to spend the night, you can sleep on my mat and it would be warmer for us both.’
You are interested, of course, how this story ended. The next morning the man went to the building society and started to work as a yard-keeper. I must say, it’s a useful profession. He made flower-beds round our house and now he grows there pansies, daisies and other nice flowers. He turned to be a very nice man and all dwellers of our porch and Cheaty are friends with him. Nobody has just loved him before. And Cheaty-quite a dog!-lives with us since that time.
Григорий
Однажды чудесным летним утром я проснулся в хорошем настроении. Встал, умылся, зарядку сделал и пошел на кухню, готовить завтрак. Жил я тогда один и позаботиться обо мне было некому, только сам на себя и надейся. Глянул в холодильник, а там ледяная пустыня, и одинокий замерзший таракан в углу сидит, зубами от холода стучит. До сих пор ума не приложу, как он мог туда попасть? Таракана я, конечно, достал и на волю отпустил. Все-таки живое существо – жалко, мог и совсем замерзнуть. А он, таракан, вместо того, чтобы мне спасибо сказать, недовольно глянул исподлобья и побежал к себе. Перед тем как в щель спрятаться, повернулся и противным голосом мне говорит (вы же знаете, у тараканов очень неприятные голоса): «Хозяин называется, в доме даже сухой корки нет!»